The best use of Newspapers

Unwrapping the tip of the cone. Slowly with my fingers. Placing it upside-down on to my mouth. Slowly rolling it a little with my two fingers. Index finger and thumb. Tapping it now. And then the precum and the great ejaculation, oh my god, ejaculating from the newspaper cone into my mouth is the sweet taste of killi. Blood red in color mixed with sugar previously chewed by a sweaty old man, made with fermented "Foah" and bileh. In the hottest sun. The cum killi is dancing in my mouth. Oh badhbanjaae! My mouth secrete extra saliva lubricating it.

Wow what a feeling. A disco in my mouth while I walk to my Wave125i. And then I sit and look at myself on the rear-view-mirror, oh how handsome. I am selfgay, I am definitely. And then my mouth expels a viscous sip of saliva mixed with red killi on to the ground making my symbol. I am thinking of Abdullah Hameed - our sexy gay spokesperson. What a body he has. Oh all male people come to our gay gathering at 12:35pm every friday and don't bring your wives. because our dicks are lubricated and ready for asses. Killi dreams and killli cones. Oh... baadh banjaae!!

What is 350 and why is it in the Maldives?

Ever since I came back from my Oxford education from the greatest capital of Malaysia Desekiyara condominium I have been seeing a lot of things about 350. Everybody is talking about 350. 350 350 350. So I asked my science friend what it is. He is very scientific and from the science Association of Maldives and Malaysia (double degree holder). He says:

"350 is the number of carbondioxygen things in one million dollars of air particles. For every tourist dollar we spend, they bring 350 dollars of carbondioxygen from traveling from Europe, England and Japan every day. So unless we have a large format offset printer we will go under water in the next cabinet meeting." Dr. Spokesman for Science Ass. (not yet dr. but soon in the next 15 years will be dr.)

So it got all of my buddies thinking. What can we do on our wave cycles? So buddy Raittey says, why dont we drive our motorcycles 350 rounds around male' every day? Sounds like a good idea. So we are doing it now. non-stop. and on break we are talking a lot about environments and resort deal investments and non-alchoholic beer. Environment is very good. we have to save the earth in every way we can, even if it takes riding big motocycles. Because we get very famous with this kind of things. Being famous can save anyone anytime. This is very special scientific facts only scientists can think of.

So anyone wanna join our 350 rounds of motocycle rides around Male' for saving the world, join us on 24 octoboer 2009 near 1 number jetty. thank you very much.

Special thanks to 350.org, Scientists of Maldives and the cabinet in my kitchen.

Wow. I got Hilathed.

This site may be a very slowed or down due to high traffic for proudly being Hilathed today.

My Oxford experience

Today I have graduated from my Malay university college of Help with a diploma in Headmaster accredited only by Maldives board of accreditation. I will be going back to my atoll to join as the Headmaster of the school where I was boned. Today I would like to thank a lot of people. First of all my boss who with his connections with lots of people of both regimes facilitated my education and job

Second all the instruments in my Farugaalu Foshi (The Oxford Set of Instruments). Without which I couldn't have finished my P.H.D (Preschool Headmaster Diploma) so easily. It was so instrumental in bringing me close to my soul. Specially the points of the dividers which I sometimes pinch myself with. The great Divider which divided me and my islanders, is one of the little things in the set which I have only recently discovered its function.

The compass helped me navigate the rough seas of the Kaashidhoo Kandu, and also helped me draw the circles. I can draw them on various sizes just by adjusting the lever! wow. Only from Oxford that kind of thoughts can come from.

The two Set Squares are so useful when I forget my rulers, I used them to draw straight lines. I use the inside part to draw decorative triangles on my thesis papers.

The rulers, without which there will be no lines in my world. The short rulers which I call the pocket rulers, I carry them with me where ever I go. It is so helpful to draw lines even long lines. The accompanying little (pocket) pencil is also very helpful. The yellow ones, sometimes I tell my friends that the Malay Ikea people copied their pencil from my Oxford set.

The paper which is usually kept inside as a lining for the very useful metal casing also deserve equal thanks. I wrote my name and phone number on the paper. And the day I forgot it in a nearby Bukit, they called me to return it.

And last but not the least is the metal case. It is by far the best designer box I have. I have this idea which I want to sell to Gucci or Giodano to make a Male purse shaped like this. I have been using mine for a couple of years now, and now it's a bit rusted. It's an antique now which I intend to donate to the Oxford museum with my thesis.

And last of all I would like to thank Helix for making it possible. I arrived Male' lastnight's flight, and Male' is so changed now that I have a lot to write soon. Until then, Good Night from Galolhu.